Bridge Over Troubled Waters
by Fractured Dreams
Summary: In one short night, everything changes for Naruto. Nothing remains the same, and he learns that maybe life isn't as bad as he'd thought it was. He found his bridge. Shounen ai, OOC.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: **Naruto doesn't belong to me, and never will.

**Warnings:** Angst, attempted suicide and depression. Shounen ai. (Kiba x Naruto, Kakashi x Iruka plus other various shounen ai and het pairings.) Don't like, don't read.

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_Bridge Over Troubled Waters_

Introduction

The human memory can be a complicated thing. It can trick, and deceive in ways which nothing else can. Sometimes, a person can remember nothing but the bad; any good memories that may have existed are lost to time, or blocked out by dark thoughts and feelings.

This is how it was for Naruto during his teenage years. Nowadays, he reflects on the darkness and wonders what would have happened if he hadn't been saved. Would he have gone on, living a half life of lies and illusions, or would he have self destructed beyond all hope?

As he thinks about it, he realizes that perhaps it was a good thing that he broke down in the way that he did. After all, sometimes great things can be born from the bad. More often than not, some things can never get better, and some wounds can never heal. It was true in his case too. For the most part, he had healed and moved on, but some of the wounds were so old and raw that not even the deepest love could reach and heal them. He's accepted that a long time ago, and he was content with what he had now. But he would never forget.

As humans, we live and we learn from the mistakes that we make. Those that are able to move on, never forget the past, and although this is a good thing, it creates as many problems as it fixes. It had certainly made him more cautious as he apporached something new to im, and this could sometimes be a bad thing- he had lost his spontaneity.

Naruto had learned that while he was young, his own mind had become his worst enemy. While wallowing in the depths of depression, his mind had magnified things to impossible sizes and this had been his down falling. He had let things overwhelm him, and had been unable to see past what he perceived to see the bigger picture.

Naruto knew his own faults now, and knew how to help himself. Despite what others may think, talking always made things better. The person who listened always had a more clear of things than he did. They could present a logical point of view which was not clouded by emotions and personal opinions. He had learned that he wasn't so alone in the world after all, that there was some good that existed out there and, perhaps most importantly he had learned to love himself as a real person, who had a bright future ahead of him. It might not always be easy, and there would be times when he couldn't see past the scars of the past, but it was there. That was one of the most important things of all.

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Yes, a short prologue. This story is a re-write of This endless dark. I wasn't so happy with it, and I decided to re do it, and change the name. Hopefully its better! Expect the first chapter soon! Thanks for reading! 


	2. Chapter 1: Sorry for the way I am

**Disclaimer:** Naruto doesn't belong to me (although I wish he did! He's my little baby!) And none of the other character do either!

**Warnings:** Angst, Shounen Ai/Yaoi. Occasional bad language. Attempted suicide.

**Pairings:** Mainly Kiba/Naruto, Kakashi/Iruka, and some occasional mentions of Neji/Sasuke, Sakura/Tenten, Shino/Hinata etc etc….

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**A BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATERS**

_**Chapter One: Sorry for the way I am.**_

Life at the moment was relatively okay for Naruto. Missions had bee going well so they had been given the day off. He had no idea what his teammates or his sensei were doing (although he had his suspicions about Kakashi) so he was wandering about aimlessly, intent on enjoying the last of the good weather.

He ignored the subtle and the not so subtle glares that followed him. Or if he couldn't, he smirked obnoxiously in their direction and laughed as he danced out of the way of whatever projectiles were hurled towards him.

It was nearing lunchtime, and his stomach suddenly decided to inform him that it was in need of some food, so he headed towards his favorite ramen stand. There was no one around who could treat him to ramen, so he would have to splurge a little, and dig into his precious savings.

As he changed directions, he heard his name being called. He turned to try to see who was calling him, but he could see no one.

"Naruto no baka! Over here!"

He turned his head towards the White Rose, a popular hangout for all shin obi. It was more of a lounge really, with cozy booths and low tables.

Slightly confused, Naruto headed towards its entrance, wondering who had called him and why. It was a few moments later that he spotted Inuzuka Kiba, who was grinning wildly and waving.

"What are you doing here?" Naruto asked in confusion.

"Eh?" It was Kiba's turn to look at him in confusion. "We always meet up here."

"What?" Naruto asked, a sinking feeling in his stomach.

"Yeah. At least once a week." Kiba frowned. "All the of our former genin teams."

"Oh." Naruto tried to hide his hurt, but Kiba must have seen it, because he looking faintly troubled.

It was a betrayal that cut deeper than any he had ever experienced. His team met here too?

"Don't worry. Maybe they just forgot to tell you." Kiba tried to reassure him, slapping his back.

That was doubtful. 'Accidentally-on-purpose' more like it. But maybe he was being too cynical about this. A knot of pain had formed in his stomach and throat, and he swallowed painfully. Sakura…and Sasuke…..His head spun in confusion as he tried to make sense of it all.

He shook his head slightly. They wouldn't do that….would they? Maybe there really was a good reason for this and he was being too suspicious.

"Come in. I'm sure they'll all want to see you."

He fought the impulse to snort rudely. After all, Kiba was obviously trying his best to comfort him, and he appreciated that.

"Whatever." He muttered under his breath as he followed Kiba inside.

He paused in the cozily lit lounge and waited for his eyes to adjust to the dimmer lighting. What he saw almost made him sit down in shock.

All of his friends (now mostly chuunin and a few jounin) were gather on a set of low couches there, looking relaxed and comfortable as they chatted and laughed.

They hadn't spotted him yet, so he took a moment to catch his breath and assess the situation.

Lee was talking in animated tones to Sakura, with Ten ten rolling her eyes as she listened in. Shikamaru looked slightly annoyed because Ino was currently attached to his arm, telling him about her day. Naruto hadn't even known that they were dating…

Shino and Hinata were sitting slightly separate from the others, but Naruto's sharp eyes picked up on the fact that they were holding hands. As were Sakura and Tenten….he almost did a double take when he saw that. Wasn't Sakura in love with Sasuke?

Speaking of which…Sasuke was…Sasuke was currently whispering something in Neji's ear. They looked incrediably intimate, touching in a way that suggested they were more that friends. So…Sasuke…and Neji too?

He couldn't help the storm of angry jealousy and pain that swept through him as he took in the scene. He hoped his face wasn't betraying his maelstrom of emotions at that moment. He hoped his face wasn't betraying him. His gut clenched tightly, to the point of physical pain and he fought the urge to double over in pain.

Beside him, Kiba looked hesitant, and seemed unsure of what to do next.

After a moment, Naruto turned to him, putting on a beaming smile that what he was truly feeling at that moment, and let out a loud laugh.

"Are you going to buy me something to eat or what, Kiba?" he asked cheerfully.

Kiba searched his face seriously for a moment. Whatever he was looking for, he must have found, for he grinned broadly at him.

"Of course I'm not! Unlike you I work for my food…"

"Oi! Now that's hardly fair, is it?" Naruto scowled as they headed over to the group.

Another successful bout of acting. For the briefest of moments, he wished he wasn't such an expert at pretending. He wished he didn't have to his his feelings like this everyday. It wasn't fair, and he hated it. He wished he wasn't always hiding from things like this.

But then, whoever said life was fair?

Naruto left shortly after, making some lame excuse that he couldn't even remember anyway. No one seemed to care. He had caught Kiba watching him as he left, but he'd dismissed it automatically, knowing it meant nothing.

His hunger for ramen, his comfort food, had vanished along with his appetite. He found himself wandering about once more. The smile, his oh so convincing mask, had disappeared though as his mind ran in tiny circles. Around and around his thought ran, repeating themselves again and again until he felt like he wanted to scream.

He no longer took any joy from this wonderful weather. There was no warmth from the sun- its rays did nothing to banish the sudden cold he felt. The singing birds did nothing to lift his spirits, which lay submerged in the murky depths of his demon-tainted soul.

Even as he was feeling so depressed, there was no sense of building hysteria accompanying it. Depression was nothing unknown to him. He could think within the depths of his depression, a calm and calculating thought process which observed all that was wrong with him and his life. A certain clarity came to him that he never experienced any other time.

He though so much, and so often that time and time again he wished he really was stupid, so he didn't have to think as much.

The look on his face must have frightened people because now they shot him quick, alarmed looks and kept out of his way. Perhaps they thought he was going to lose it completely and slaughter everything and everyone within a five mile radius.

_Let them think that_, he thought. _At least they would leave him alone._

Naruto didn't care where he went. He let his feet take him. So he wasn't surprised when he found himself walking alone in the forest, heading for the river. Oddly enough it was waster which calmed him. He loved the river. He loved to walk beside it and just…think. The quiet sound of running water had always served to sooth his anger, and his hurt and so he'd been coming here ever since he was a child.

Naruto loved to just sit and watch the sunlight dance on the waters surface. The river stones on which the sunlight rippled were smooth. Years and Years of water running over them had smoothed all the rough edges.

The lord knew that his rough edges would never be smooth. If anything, thje years would only make them sharper and more jagged.

After he had found a nice shady spot to sit, he settled down to think and stare into the water.

_How could he have been so blind to what was happening around him? How was it that he had missed seeing those particular bonds form?_

_And hw was it that he had been excluded, yet again, from the comfortable friendships they had developed between them?_

Well, that last question was an easy one to answer. He was surrounded by such love, and yet he had no part in it.

With narrowed eyes, he threw a rock into the river.

He didn't know what any of it meant, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to know either. Was it better to live in ignorance and not see the things that could cause hurt or was it better to know and live in misery?

Naruto wanted desperately to know and to understand. He couldn't stand the thought of not knowing but he shied away from the pain it would cause.

He didn't want to feel this hurt anymore. Long ago he had given up hope of ever being truly happy (could anyone be?) or at least content for long periods of time. But he wished he could be empty at least, emotionless as he had though Sasuke had been. At least it would scorch with every truth and painful discovery he uncovered.

Maybe if he was smarter he would be able to analyze this properly and come to some sort of understanding with himself. He could pick it apart and inspect it carefully before putting it back together with some resemblance of order.

But he wasn't a genius like Sasuke or Neji. He was the first to admit that. Hre could never hope to live up to the talent and intelligence that surrounded him. No, he was surrounded by his own blanket of mediocrity. The only thin that set him apart was the kyuubi. If he hadn't been able to use its power he would have been an average shinobi of Konoha. He'd probably be dead by now.

He rubbed his eyes tiredly. There was no space for him to breath in his village anymore, no room for him to feel anything but constricted by the expectations of those around him.

He longed desperately for a real friend. For someone who would listen to him, as if he was a real person. For someone who would willingly lend a helping hand when he needed it, and for someone who would welcome his own help instead of pushing it aside.

He wasn't selfish. But even he deserved that, right?

They had made it clear to him. They could have screamed it in his face and it would be no clearer than it already was.

There was no place for him there.

He wasn't brooding, or sulking he told himself. He was thinking, and pondering on this. The message had gotten through at last. He wasn't alone in the world, for he was surrounded by people. But he was alone in his heart, for he was in no one else's.

He decided as it got dark that he didn't want to return to an empty apartment again, so he headed towards Iruka's. His former sensei had given him a key long ago and had told him to let himself in whenever he wanted to, even if he wasn't home. He was always welcome.

It was nice, and had filled him with warm fuzzy feelings when Iruka had told him. Even if he didn't have any friends among his peers, he always had Iruka, his mentor and foster unofficial foster parent. He wasn't completely alone.

But he didn't often use the key, or even stay at Iruka's that much anymore. Iruka lived with Kakashi, who was his lover and life partner. They were happy together, and he didn't want to intrude on their privacy, so he stayed away.

The apartment was dark and quiet. No one was home yet. Which meant that Iruka was wither still at the academy or out somewhere with Kakashi and their friends.

After slipping off his sandals, Naruto wandered around the silent apartment. There were photo frames on the walls. Him and Iruka…Iruka and his team mates…Kakashi and Iruka…Kakashi and team 7…

So many memories…Iruka's apartment was a welcoming one. Always tidy and clean, but there was no formality to the neatness. Small items, figurines, books picture and scrolls all gave it a comfortable lived in feel. This was what a real home should be like. Filled with warmth and love and caring.

Naruto had always loved Iruka's apartment, ever since he had first come here when he was twelve. Five years later and he was still in love with the place. Well, it wasn't really Iruka's it was Iruka's and Kakashi's. He wondered if they would start a family. Even if they were a homosexual couple, there were other ways they could start their own family.

Iruka loved children, hence his career as a schoolteacher. Naruto knew that Iruka wanted children of his own someday. He wasn't so sure about Kakashi. It was sometimes hard for shinobi to start their own familes. Their lives were so unpredictable and unstable, but that didn't mean that it didn't happen. He had no doubt in his mind that Iruka could make a family work, despite the frequent ups and downs of the shinobi lifestyle.

Would there be a place for him in that family?

Selfishly, he wanted there to be. He wanted to belong to a family. He wanted to be loved, because he loved. Oh yes, he loved. He loved so many things that sometimes his heart ached with the amount of love he felt. Sometimes he thought he would overflow.

He loved Ramen. The way it smelt, and the way its spicy aroma would always evoke a strong hunger in him. He loved to walk in the rain, and to lie in his back in the warm sunlit grass in summer. He loved water. He loved the feeling of accomplishment that rushed through him whenever he completed a mission. He loved to learn new techniques and to train, and travel.

He loved Iruka for all his warmth and wisdom. And he loved Kakashi because he always seemed to know. He loved Sakura for her sharp intelligence and her wit. He loved Sasuke, for he was a brother and best friend. He loved Sandaime, and Tsunade-baa chan and ero-sennin.

Some of there people genuinely cared for him back. He could take pleasure in that, and he found little happiness's in the things that he loved; he could be content with that.

He could also take comfort in the illusions he built around himself. He would always have his dignity, his adaptability and his stamina.

But he longed to be held by that special someone. He longed to feel warm and safe for once. He longed to forget and be himself.

He longed for the others, his "friends" to stop taking him for granted and forgetting he was there.

He longed to belong to someone, and for someone to belong to him and him alone.

Naruto wandered around the darkened apartment for the better part of an hour. He half-heartedly poked around in the kitchen for food but soon gave up. He longed for Iruka to come home so they could talk about petty things. He longed for some company.

But no one came. The apartment stayed cold and quiet.

He lay down on the couch facing the living room window and stared out into the darkness, not really thinking about anything in particular. The stars twinkled at him as he breathed in the combined and familiar scents of Kakashi and Iruka.

Hours passé, but he did not move. Again and again he told himself that he was blowing things out of proportion, but his mind refused to accept this, as he lay there, wrapped in his loneliness and his depression.

Around midnight, he felt two presences approach the front door. It was Iruka and Kakashi.

The door was opened amid quiet words and muffled laughter.

He closed his eye, pretending to sleep and listened.

"Whose sandals are they?" Kakashi asked.

"They must be Naruto's." Iruka replied, followed by sounds of movement and the door closing. "I wonder what he's doing here?"

"You haven't seen him for awhile." Kakashi commented.

"No I haven't. We should keep it down; he's probably asleep."

There was a muffled thud then laughed.

"Damn it! Why didn't he put the lights on!" Iruka hissed. Kakashi's only reply was laughter.

Naruto kept his eyes closed as they came into the living room. Suddenly he didn't want to talk. Not to Iruka, not to anyone, so he slowed his breathing in the pretense of sleep.

"What's he doing sleeping on the couch? He knows I keep a room for him." Iruka said softly.

He felt something soft and warm covering him. A blanket.

"He must be cold. Its freezing in here."

Funnily enough, he hadn't even felt the cold. Or maybe he was too busy thinking about what had happened to day to notice that the temperature was dropping around him.

"Come to bed. I'm sure I can warm you up," came the sly response from Kakashi.

There was a soft _thwacking _sound as Iruka threw something at him. A quiet "Ow!" accompanied the laughter that followed the two out as they headed for their bedroom.

Naruto clutched the blanket closer as he fought back his tears and listened to them prepared for bed and settle down for the night. After awhile, the apartment became quiet once more.

Naruto stayed awake.

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Hey all. Here's the first chapter! I'm hoping to get some review responses this time! (Hint Hint!) But thanks for reading! I'd like to make a few things clear before I go any further with this however.

In this story, all the rookie nine and seventeen years old. Neji's team is eighteen.

Lets just pretend that Sasuke has left the village and returned. It doesn't matter how or why- its not important. He isn't even a major character in this story, so its irrelevant.

This is a Kiba/Naruto fic. I'm pretty sure I've made this clear before, but if you don't like this kind of story, then don't read it and definitely don't flame it. I'm not interested, so don't try.

I realise that parts of this are very unoriginal, but give it a chance, ne? I promise it gets better!

So please review! Review keep me alive! Thanks for reading, folks! I'll be posting again soon!

Fractured Dreams


	3. Chapter 2: Walking Wounded

**Disclaimer: **The naruto characters and their world do not belong to me.

**Warnings: **Shounen Ai/Yaoi (haven't decided which yet!) Angst and occasional bad language. May contain topics which could offend.

**Pairings: **Kiba/Naruto, Kakashi/Iruka and others.

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**A BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATERS**

_**Chapter Two: Walking Wounded**_

Naruto opened his eyes when bright sunlight invaded his realm of sleep. He was warm and comfortable in his little patch of sunlight on the couch but he knew that he needed to get up. Dawn had broken and he had to meet with his team mates at the bridge.

Yawning widely, he got up and padded silently to the kitchen. Unfortunately, bad timing had him walk in as Kakashi pressed Iruka up against the cupboards for a bruising, passionate kiss. Neither noticed him there, and after a moments indecision he walked to the fridge and opened it.

They broke apart in surprise as he pulled out a bottle of orange juice.

"Morning." He said as he took the juice to the breakfast bar and began to fix himself breakfast.

There was awkward silence before Iruka cleared his throat.

"Ah…did you sleep well last night?"

Naruto was acutely aware that he was at their place uninvited, but he pretended as if the thought hadn't occurred to him. In fact, it made him feel horrible, and only made him correct in his assumption that they needed their privacy.

"Hmmmmhmm." Was his only reply as he shoveled spoonfuls of cereal into his mouth with his usual vigor.

Inside, he was feeling about as uncomfortable as Iruka was, but he would die before he admitted that to them. Instead, he covered his true feelings by beaming widely at them.

Iruka smiled back at him, looking relieved and a little embarrassed. He knew Kakashi well enough by now to know that he was smirking beneath his mask.

"Are you going to come over for dinner tonight? I'm not sure what we're eating, but we'd love to have you."

He torn, for he wanted to, he really did. But it was obvious from what he'd interrupted that they needed their time alone. So he shook his head, feeling very heavy hearted.

"Nah. I have plans for tonight." He said around the last mouthfuls of his breakfast.

"Really? What're you doing?"

Was that suspicion he saw in Iruka's eyes?

"Kiba an' me are having Ramen together," he lied as he gulped down the dregs of his orange juice. "He lost a bet he made with me so he owes me."

"Oh okay. Some other time perhaps."

Iruka let it go at that. It stung that Iruka bought such an obvious lie. After all these years, didn't he know Naruto well enough to be able to tell when he was lying? Or maybe he didn't care. That thought hurt more than it should have. He had accepted that maybe he wasn't a necessary part of Iruka's life, but to think that he didn't care…cut him deeper than any knife could.

Having finished his meal, he hesitated for the briefest of seconds before dashing to Iruka and hugging him tightly. He felt warm arms wrap around him, and warm breath fan his hair gently. Naruto closed his eyes as he savored the pain he felt. Suddenly he wanted to confess everything, to pour his heart out to this replacement parent he had found. He almost broke down and sobbed, but the moment was gone. An idea had begun to take shape in his mind the night before, and in his heart, he knew that this would perhaps be the last time he saw Iruka. With any luck, he would be out of Konoha forever, and out of their lives permanently.

Naruto tore himself out of that comforting embrace and raced out of the kitchen, calling out cheery goodbyes and warning Kakashi not to be late this morning.

He raced away from that apartment and the memories as fast as his legs could carry him. His eyes were squeezed close as he ran, and miraculously, he crashed into no one.

No one was at the Bridge yet. The designated meeting time was awhile off yet, so he had awhile to prepare himself for the barrage of insults he knew he'd receive from Sakura, and the silent scorn and dismissal of Sasuke.

He knelt beside the bridge and splashed cold water on his face, rubbing at his eyes.

There were no tears on his face. He had learned not to cry over things like this years ago. Crying did not, and could not make things better, nor did it change reality. Even if he did cry, people would only laugh and call him weak.

The face in the water, his own reflection was a stranger to him.

What he saw was as ordinary boy, average looking with messy blonde hair, big blue eyes and faint whisker marks on his cheeks, which branded him for what he was.

Naruto didn't think himself particularly ugly, but he wasn't handsome and he definitely wasn't beautiful like Sasuke and Neji or Ino and Sakura.

His wasn't a face people fell in love with. His was a face that was seen and forgotten moments later. Unremarkable, indistinguishable except for the faint whisker marks which lined his cheeks.

Besides, it wasn't his face that mattered, nobody saw his face. They looked past it to see the demon, the fiery fox which was sealed within him. The fox that carried a thousand curses of sorrow and hatred for stealing the lives of people who were loved. It was oddly ironic that he, who had no such love, should carry such a cursed creature. He carried those same curses, passed onto him by a legacy.

If pain and loneliness were his constant companions, then so too was anger. Anger was what made him work and train so hard, striving hopelessly for a distant dream. It was his anger at the world for its cruel treatment of him that drove him; anger at the people who abused him emotionally and mentally. It was anger at the demon fox within him and at the people who had condemned him to such a fate that kept him alive. He was angry at himself most of all, for caring so much about what everyone thought of him and for letting their words hurt him so. But it was days like this that he found he was hurting too much to be angry.

Eventually, he stood up and turned away from the inner ugliness staring back at him. He leaped onto the bridges railing to sit and wait for his teammates. The water flowed beneath his feet, and he watched as the odd Sakura tree blossom floated by.

The same routine took place every morning for the past few years. Sasuke would walk up shrouded in his usual silence. Naruto watched the way he walked. Sasuke walked as if he had a purpose, a destination that no one else could see, or even guess at. He never strolled.

Naruto would chirp his usual 'good morning Sasuke-bastard' and Sasuke would stay silent, ignoring him as if he didn't even exist. This morning, Naruto did just that, and all he received was a disinterested 'Hnn' in response.

Nothing unusual. It had gotten so that it didn't even bother Naruto anymore. That was just Sasuke. He thought it was a good thing that Neji tended to be as cold and as distant as Sasuke; as lovers, they made a compatible pair.

A few minutes later Sakura would run up, full of eagerness and energy with her 'Good morning Sasuke-kun!'

That was exactly what happened this morning, except for one thing. After her enthusiastic greeting to Sasuke, she turned to Naruto with a small uncertain smile.

Naruto, surprise and taken back, stared at her in shock. Even Sasuke was attentive as he watched.

"G-good morning, Naruto." She murmured

Naruto blinked in surprise, and made a conscious effort to keep his jaw from dropping in astonishment. After a moment of shocked silence, he realized that they were both waiting for his reaction and pasted a huge smile on his face.

"Good morning Sakura-chan!"

For once though, she didn't yell at him and hit him for being so loud. She merely smiled a bit more in response and sat down to wait quietly for Kakashi to arrive. She didn't cling to Sasuke and try to make conversation with him- it seemed that she was completely over her crush on him. No surprise, seeing as she was with Tent ten.

Something had changed. The silence between them was different, uneasy. As if…as if, by silent agreement they acknowledged that something had changed.

Naruto narrowed his eyes in though as he pondered this strange situation. Normally, he would be talking loudly about something pointless and nonsensical; trying to coax Sakura to come on a date with him, or attempting unsuccessfully to goad Sasuke into an argument.

But today he decided not to put up that façade. It didn't seem appropriate, and it would only drain what little energy he had left. The sadness and depression lingered around him. He didn't want to leave Konoha- it was his lifeblood, despite the painful memories and hardships. He was nothing but a shin obi. How would he live if he left? Would he be a poor wanderer, stealing from farms and good, honest folk? Would he be a beggar on the streets, slowly withering away from starvation?

That was no kind of life. So what was there out side of Konoha?

The answer was nothing. There was nothing out there for him, but more pain and suffering. But there was nothing here for him either. What was the answer he was looking for? Where was he to go from here?

He turned his mind from that particular path; now was not the time for that. He would think about that when he was alone, and when it was quiet. Instead, he thought about the current situation. What had changed?

Maybe he had done something yesterday at the White Rose to offend the group. No…if he had, Sakura would have killed him by now (or at least tried to).

Or maybe…or maybe they felt sorry for him. Maybe they felt bad for leaving out, or at least finding out. If that was the case, then he didn't want their pity, or their apologies. He wanted them to see him as a friend, someone they wanted to be around because they liked him. Not someone who they invited out of pity.

It made him angry, their pity if that was indeed what it was. It made him feel like he was someone lower that them, someone who deserved to be indulged because of his unfortunate circumstances. Kind of like how rich people looked down condescendingly at a homeless person.

It only made him even more aware of how different he was from them and he hated it. It only alienated him from them even further and made him feel even more isolated and alone.

He stood up abruptly on the railing and shaded his eyes as he looked for Kakashi- he was nowhere in sight.

"Ano…Naruto?" Sakura's tentative voice broke through his reverie.

"He looked down at her. "What is it Sakura?" he asked.

Today was the day, he decided, that he wasn't going to hide anymore. He was tired, bone-weary in fact, of pretending. He didn't care if they hated him for his acts and masks. He didn't care if they hated him for all his lies. Uzamaki Naruto was tired of dancing the same old patterns and dances.

He was tired, and he just didn't care.

He could see the shock and surprise in her eyes. It figured that she would be surprised that he could be like a normal person. Of course she didn't see him as a normal person. She saw him as someone different.

Well, he was different. Even though he hated the fact, and even though it was the reason he was lonely and sad all of the time, he realized that no matter how much he may fight and struggle to change it, he couldn't. He would never be anything but different.

A small part of him was grateful. He wasn't sure if he wanted to live like some of the people he knew- ignorant of the harsh realities of the world. They lived sheltered and protected. At least he knew what it was like.

But it was only a small part of him.

And that knowledge, as well as his loneliness and his sorrow, was what made him strong.

Looking into Sakura's eyes, he knew that.

He knew that he didn't want to be here right now. He needed to be alone, away from them to gather his thought and to gain clarity. He wanted to find the answer to that question.

What else was there for him? He couldn't stay, but he couldn't leave. He needed an answer to that.

"What is it Sakura?" he repeated his question softly, still looking her in the eyes.

"A-are you okay? You seem distracted." She seemed nervous now, as if he was making her uncomfortable.

He managed to give her a small smile. "Yeah. I'm okay Sakura."

It was a lie. He was not okay. Far from it in fact. Perhaps she knew that. Perhaps she guessed. It was unlikely.

Now he crouched down so he was almost at eye level with her as he studied her.

"Sakura…can you tell Kakashi-sensei that I'm going to see the Hokage?"

"But…but we have a mission." She protested weakly.

"I know. I won't be coming today. Just…tell him please?"

He didn't wait for her answer, he just took off, heading through the trees and taking all the shortcuts he knew to get to the tower.

He was nothing but a blur- just like his existence in this miserable place- as he raced over the rooftops of houses and apartments.

Within minutes, he was at Tsunade's office door. The guards eyed him with something like distaste in their eyes, but he admitted him without a word.

Shizune and Tsunade were bent over some paper work, discussing it in low tones when he entered.

"What are you doing here gaki?" Tsunade frowned at him. "Doesn't your team have a mission?"

Naruto summoned a cocky grin, but it seemed brittle and wooden even to him.

"And here I was thinking you'd be glad to see me, baa-chan."

A vein in Tsunade's forehead throbbed, but for some unknown reason she let the insult slide. Sighing heavily, she handed Shizune a bundle of scrolls.

"Shizune, take these down to the mission room, won't you? I'll be down there shortly."

"Hai, Tsunade-sama." Shizune accepted the bundle and hurried away.

Tsunade waited until the door was closed before she spoke.

"Are you going to tell me what this is about?" she asked eventually.

Naruto walked over to the desk and looked down at her, as she regarded him calmly.

"I'm requesting personal time off, Tsunade. Just a week."

"Personal time? Why? Did you have a fight with your team?" Tsunade was frowning in confusion now.

He shook his head. "No. I just…need to get my personal life in order. I fear its beginning to affect my performance on the field."

A lie, but a necessary one. Tsunade could not allow something like that to go unaddressed. It was the only was he knew to get her to agree, he knew.

"That is grave indeed." She commented slowly. "Are you okay?"

"I think so, I just…"

"You don't have to explain yourself to me, Naruto." She said abruptly before smiling. "I know sometimes everything can get a bit too much, eh? A bit overwhelming."

He nodded, grateful that he wouldn't have to think up some elaborate and believable excess to explain his request.

"Take two weeks. Then we'll talk, and see of you feel up to working again, Agreed?"

"Agreed. Arigato, Tsunade-baa-chan. I appreciate it."

"As well you should, brat!" she smiled at him. " Now get out of here and do whatever it is you need to. And be careful. I'd hate it if something happened to you."

He smiled at her. "I know. Sayonara, Tsunade."

He left feeling slightly better than when he'd entered. At least something was finally going his way.

* * *

Well, that's chapter two, everyone! I'm desperate to get this story out for some reason. Its really bugging me, and I find it difficult to work on anything other than this at the moment, so I figured I'd get it out of the way now and then go back to work on the others! I like this version better than the original one, seeing as I changed a few things here and there, so review and tell me what you think!

Just as a side note, I know that Sakura is supposed to be smart, but I felt like being a little mean to her because she used to be so mean to Naruto! Actually, I like her now, because she's nice and actually a good friend to Naruto. But I haven't figured out what role she's going to play in this story yet.

_**Thanks to: **_

**_Kagome13chan: _**I know! I've only ever found one or two, so I decided it was time to add another! Thank! For reviewing!

**_XItadakimasuX: _**Thanks for your encouragement! You made my day! Thank yooouuuuuu!

**_RabidButterfly: _**(Cool name by the way!) Thank you! I love you for reviewing! Please keep reading!

**_Aydryan: _**Wow! I'm glad you do! Please read the next chapter and tell me what you think! Thanks!

By the way, all my stories are not betad, and this one is no exception, so please keep that in mind and don't criticize me too badly, ne?

Thanks for reading, guys!


	4. Chapter 3: Once Upon a Time

**Disclaimer: **Naruto and it's character's don't belong to me.

**Warnings: **Shounen Ai, angst and occasional bad language. May contain topics which could offend. Un-betad

**Pairings: **Kiba/Naruto, Kakashi/Iruka and others.

* * *

**A Bridge Over Troubled Waters**

_**Chapter Three: Once Upon a Time  
**_

Naruto decided to head to the forest to train after he had seen Tsunade. Even if he had just taken time off to sort a few things out, that didn't mean he could stop training. Besides, training helped him to clear his mind, and once his body found its rhythm, he found his mind was clear to think while he worked. Any anger his thinking may provoke could be worked out of his system through the training. It was a good way to vent.

Today was another beautiful day, but it was cooler than usual which meant that it would be cold tonight. Maybe tomorrow there would be rain. He hated the rain, because it suited the sadness he felt inside. When it rained, he would always get depressed, because it seemed as if the sky was crying- crying along with him.

Even so, it wasn't all bad. If it was raining then the villagers would stay indoors and he would be free to walk in peace with no one to hinder him.

Sometimes he would come to the forest and listen to the rain falling on the leaves, a soothing melody for troubled souls like his. So even though rain usually made him more depressed than usual, it had its good points too.

As he ran, the leaves swayed gently, bring to his nose a wonderful scent of crisp greenery.

He was about to enter a clearing by the river but halted suddenly when he realized that there was someone else there.

Naruto crouched, hidden from sight on a branch. It was Kiba, sitting by the river. Akamaru was no where to be seen. He was about to leave silently, without disturbing him but…some small part of him was curious. Why was he here alone? Shouldn't he be training with his team? Or maybe even visiting with his friends?

He jumped to the ground and landed quietly. Even so, Kiba's sharp ears picked up the sound and his movements and he turned. Seeing who it was he smiled.

"Hey Naruto."

Naruto hesitated, unsure of what was going on. Why was Kiba being nice to him? Shouldn't he be telling him to go away? Or at least telling him how annoying he was. But Kiba's smile was full of warmth and welcome, and he couldn't bring himself to leave.

"Hey. What're you doing here? He asked, feeling slightly apprehensive.

"Not much. I came out here to walk Akamaru, but now I'm just thinking."

Naruto wasn't used to seeing this calmer, quieter side of Kiba. Wasn't he usually as loud as Naruto and twice as daring? He was shocked. Kiba…..serious? Devoid of his usual feiry personality, Kiba was a completely different person, and Naruto was intrigued to find out what was behind Kiba's exterior.

Maybe…maybe he wasn't the only one to hide behind masks.

"About what?" Naruto asked as he moved closer.

"A lot of things. Nothing really important." He shrugged then looked at Naruto once more. "Where are you off to then? I thought your team had a mission."

"We did. We do, it's just…Tsunade gave me time off for awhile." Naruto explained, feeling slightly uncomfortable and embarrassed. He shifted on his feet for a minute before finally walking over to where Kiba sat on the river bank and sitting down a little bit away from him.

"I see."

And that was that. Kiba asked no questions about that particular topic and for that Naruto was grateful. They didn't say much for awhile. Kiba was looking out over the river, his eyes distant. Naruto was shredding a blade of grass meticulously, concentrating deliberately on that as he tried to think of something to say.

It occurred to him, somewhere in the back on his mind that maybe Kiba didn't want him to be here at the moment. Perhaps he had come here to be alone, and here was naruto, intruding yet again where he wasn't wanted.

Just as he was about to make an excuse and leave him alone, Kiba looked at him.

"Naruto, I wanted to…" he began, but excited barking nearby cut him off.

Akamaru raced into the clearing with his tail wagging and his tongue flying. The dog leapt onto Kiba and began to lick his face enthusiastically.

Kiba laughed as he tried to fend off the dog with little success. Naruto smiled a little sadly. Akamaru wasn't a puppy anymore; he had grown over the past few years and was now fully grown. He would never be a huge dog, but he was a fair sized medium one, with a well-compacted body and strong, sharp teeth and intelligent eyes.

Naruto's glance flickered towards Kiba. He was tall now at seventeen years of age, and he had discarded his favored jacket years ago for a chuunin's flak vest, underneath which he wore a short sleeved, form fitting fishnet shirt. He wore baggy black cargo style pant favored by most shinobi, riddled with pockets for his foods pills and the like. Kiba had a well-proportioned body, with broad shoulders and a wide chest, slim hips and a thin waist and long legs. His shaggy hair was still messy, his eyes were a deep warm chocolate brown with slightly slitted pupils. The red painted fangs on his face were slightly longer now, symbolic of his higher ranks. All in all, his body type was well suited to his brawling style of fighting.

Naruto was also a chuunin now, although he wasn't as tall as Kiba, he was a little more compacted in the body, and although neither of them were particularly bulky, both were strong. Naruto would be hard pressed to beat Kiba in a fight; the man had improved his skills with hard work and his strength had increased drastically.

As he watched Kiba with Akamaru now happily curled up on his lap, he wished that he too could feel as if he were moving forward. He wanted to feel as if he had a destination in his life, and he definitely didn't want to feel as if he was always going to be walking down this same, endless and lonely road.

Kiba smiled at him now, and he managed to return it.

"I wanted to apologize." Kiba said.

"What for?" Naruto asked, a confused frown on his face.

"For yesterday. Even if the others don't realize it, I know it must have hurt you and I'm sorry for that. I thought you knew."

For a moment, Naruto was surprised. No one had ever apologized to him before, and he was left wondering how to respond. Then he felt that twinge of resentment again and he looked away.

"I don't want your pity. There's no need to feel sorry for me." He said quietly, but with an edge to his voice that even he could hear.

"That's not it, Naruto." Kiba insisted strongly. "I don't feel sorry for you, I just…regret that I haven't seen what's been going on until now."

"Forget about it Kiba. It doesn't matter anyway."

"Yes it does. Maybe I haven't been as alone as you have, but I have felt lonely before, and I know what its like to be left out."

Naruto looked at him curiously, and Kiba smiled at his unvoiced question

"I come from the Inuzuka clan. It's a big family, and I was always the youngest when I was growing up. I was left out of the things my sisters and cousins did because I was too young and childish. I was too old to stay with my parents and the adults all the time, so I often found myself alone."

This was an alien concept to Naruto. Feeling left out, even when you had a family of your own was something Naruto had never thought of before.

Kiba smiled again when he saw Naruto's disbelief.

"You should talk to some of the other big clans as well. Hinata, for example. She has always felt inadequate and useless amongst her own family. Her own father shunned her for years when she was growing up because he thought she was too weak. There are problems in every family."

Naruto nodded, seeing the sense in this.

"And families don't always know what's best for you either. Sometimes they let their own hopes and desires get in the way of letting their children grow up to be who they want to be."

Naruto waited for Kiba to continue. Here was someone who could tell him what it was like to have a family. Here was someone who could tell him what he'd been missing out on his whole life, and what's more, Kiba didn't seem to mind telling him either.

"Sometimes…life sucks doesn't it?" Kiba said, somewhat sadly.

"Kiba? Did something happen?" Naruto asked, almost shyly.

He didn't receive an answer for awhile and Naruto had just decided not to ask again when Kiba finally spoke.

"In a few days time, it's the anniversary of my father's death."

"Oh.I'm…I'm sorry. How did he…"

"Die? He was injured on a mission when I was fourteen. By the time they got him back to the village they couldn't save him."

Naruto could feel Kiba's pain emanating off of him; his brown eyes were clouded as he remembered and he wanted to reach out and touch his shoulder but he couldn't bring himself to.

A moment later, he berated himself for being such a coward.

"You miss him don't you?" he asked eventually.

"I do. He was. He was everything to me. My best friend, my idol. We were very close, and once he was gone, I didn't know what to do with myself."

"How did you cope?"

"I promised myself that I would become just like him. I would be a great shinobi like him, and I would make my clan proud."

Kiba's fingers were buried in Akamaru's thick fur, and they moved slowly as he talked.

"When I became a genin and started doing mission, I realized that there was no way I could be like him. We were two completely different people, and no matter how hard I tried, I could never be an exact copy of him, and I definitely couldn't fill his place in the clan. I watched my family and relatives move on and forget him and I was so angry at them."

Kiba had a small smile on his face as he looked down at Akamaru in his lap. It was obvious that this was a very painful subject for Kiba, so Naruto stayed quiet and let him talk, because it seemed like he needed someone to listen. If it made him feel better, then Naruto was content to just listen.

"Recently, I realized that they haven't forgotten him. They're trying to live their lives and be happy, because that was what father would have wanted. It was me who was the foolish one. Instead of trying to be myself and become a strong shinobi in my own right I was living in the past and trying to copy him. I was the one who was wrong, not them."

"Is that…is that why you're here now?"

Kiba shook his head. "No. I'm here because I need to get away sometimes to remember what I'm supposed to be. It helps."

Naruto nodded, unsure why his throat was so tight at the moment. So maybe there was no one who understood his pain, but that didn't mean he was the only one who _felt _pain, in what ever form it may come. He felt suddenly ashamed of himself. Kiba had fought against his pain and learned from it had used it to help himself grow. Naruto was not able to do that and he didn't know why. Maybe there was something wrong with him, but whatever it was, it made him feel very small and unworthy.

He drew his knees up to his chest and hugged them tightly.

"Thank you for telling me."

"That's okay. I thought that maybe it would help you. With whatever it is that's bothering you."

_It does. If only you knew how much……_

"Would you tell me about your family?" he asked hesitantly.

* * *

Not a very long update I know! Sorry! But I've done three updates in three days and I wanted to post the chapter by today! Next week I'll be updating again because I've finished school….and I'm unemployed…..and I have nothing better to do! So there you go! At least it gives you guys something to keep you occupied right? 

Thank you for all you reviews, and I will now be replying to the personally, which is a lot easier! It means that I don't have to sit here and type them out all in one go! Very easy!

Thanks for reading, and I hope to be hearing from you!


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